"when I grow up"

I'm 40 years old. Like most people over the age of 30, I wonder what else I could have done with my life. What was I supposed to be? Everyone (with a few exceptions) is particularly good at something... Math, science, design, debating, and an endless number of other possibilities. I am capable of so many things. I have put my heart into very few things and failed. But other than counting cards in a spades game and knowing just what to say to infuriate someone, I've mastered very little. Do you believe everyone was destined for something? Does everyone have the potential to be a master of their craft? Do some people just miss their calling while others never had one at all? In a perfect world, who would you have been?

 

Hindsight is 20/20 vision. I know you feel the way you do, but I saw something different with what I just read. You say you're forty and that you put your heart, time and energy into only a few things and failed. I see it as; you are only forty, who has put your heart into just the right number of things to know what you don't want to do and that your 'failures' are an expression of your journey to find the right craft/occupation/hobby for you. You also said that you've only mastered spades and knowing what to say to infuriate people. You might look down on a talent like playing spades, but that might be because you have mastered that craft. You've learned everything there is to learn about it and it seems dull and repetitive. That is a part of mastering anything. You forget how you got there and the opportunities it provided you. You could use those skills to teach others and interact with them, if you wanted. Hell, they might enrich your life in the future in some way or another. The fact that you can say the one thing that infuriates someone is also an indespendable tool. Think of it in reverse. If you are such a good judge of character, or knowledgeable of the other person, that you could put them down so easily; what could you do to make them better? Could you alleviate their worries? Being negative goes hand in hand with being positive. It is up to you to utilize your skills and abilities to cultivate your journey tomorrow and the next day. You should also learn to remember the journey. You might wake up today with regret for not doing enough, but you could also wake up another 40 years from now wishing you hadn't worked so hard to be a perfect representation of what young people think a good life is. Just enjoy it and you might find yourself enjoying the ride!