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How to cope in a sexless marriage

Discussion in 'Medical' started by earnt, Feb 16, 2018.

  1. earnt

    earnt New Member

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    I would love to hear my colleagues views on the importance sex in a relationship. Could you survive in a relationship when there is no sex. Would you cheat on your partner.
    What are your coping mechanisms.
    Is there such a thing as true love without sex?
     
  2. santanu

    santanu Member

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    It is not compulsory that marriage has to have the ingredient of love but sex in marriage is a must. In eastern world, marriages take place without the partners knowing each other. So the question of love for marriage does not arise. When comes to sex in marriage the whole world says yes.

    One can be deprived of sex after marriage due to several reasons. Reasons can be emotional, physical or medical. Unfortunately, all reasons for sexless marriage cannot be addressed by outsiders.

    Is there such a thing as true love without sex? There may be few cases here and there but in general, it does not exist.
     
  3. uroborosz

    uroborosz New Member

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    I'm not really a fan of prearranged marriage, in my point of view everybody should be able to choose whom to marry. I would never marry someone I don't love, and I wouldn't stay in a relationship with no sex. Although there are some exceptions, for example, if the lack of sex is a result of some kind of illness. It would be very inappropriate to break up with somebody just because he is sick. For me cheating is not an option either.
    I totally disagree with you. Sex is never an obligation, it has to come from within, if it doesn't then all the enjoyment it could give you, would be gone. I believe that everybody has to find the right partner, somebody who fits them emotionally, mentally and sexually. With the lack of any of these the marriage or the relationship would not work in the long run.
     
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  4. santanu

    santanu Member

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    Sex in marriage is very essential if not a must. The sexual desires are the product of certain chemical reaction at a certain time in the body. It is similar to any other desire a human is subjected to on a daily basis. You may kindly understand that relationships (Husband-wife, brother-sister etc.)are created and recognized by a human as a social necessity. Nature neither recognizes any "Relationships" nor compel anyone to follow it and so made "Sex" an important part of human interaction without putting any barrier of relationship. I have not yet found any able person who accepts the idea of a sexless married life.
     
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  5. tonnie

    tonnie New Member

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  6. tonnie

    tonnie New Member

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    I will say this is a diverse topic. Some people will cope but mostly it depends on ones mind. If you channel your thoughts towards the said issue, then your mind will remind you there is something that is amiss. Personally, I am yet to hear of a person who died because of coitus deprivation.

    I do not know whether masturbation will count as cheating when it comes to sex between two partners, but I am certain some partners result to it when the other is not cooperative.

    As to true love without sex, I will differ. In the first place if there is something called love and one partner craves it with the knowledge of the other but the other fails to relieve the craving one, then the denying one does not love the other. Also, if there is love, there must be full understanding between the two partners when to have sex and when not to.
     
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  7. saha106

    saha106 New Member

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    Pray to God and go to your bed. One should find the love for their partner to know that sex is a minor issue in the relationship. Love goes above all things so your sexual desires will be quenched without interactions. DO NOT GO OUTSIDE OF THE MARRIAGE!
     
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  8. Youngshark

    Youngshark New Member

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    Since it is the subject of marriage then sex should really be from a place of love. It is an important tool to also rekindle the love that partners have for one another. Without sex a marriage that has not matured sufficiently can die off. It is therefore very important for married people to engage in it.

    Its importance is in fact indicated by the fact that in some areas people refer to sex as making love.
     
  9. Eli

    Eli New Member

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    There is definitely such a thing, although I don't believe I am one of the people that can partake in it. As a young and healthy bisexual person, I have basic needs that I need fulfilled. Of course, I'm only me, and there are definitely people who experience romantic love without sexual attraction. These people, called "asexuals", simply don't feel sexual attraction to anyone. They may still have romantic feelings, and some still have sex for their partner's sake. Others experience a sex drive, but with no attraction, and have the urge to masturbate but do not want to be with another person. Still more have no romantic attractions and no sex drive, and live their lives completely platonically -- and are completely satisfied with that.

    Again, though, I am not one of those people. I would never force my partner to have sex, but I would most likely ask to either end the relationship, or open it in some way. My partner is older than I am, so his sex drive is not as high as mine. There are times when I masturbate because he's not in the mood, and that's fine. If he never wanted sex though, or only wanted it once in a blue moon, I don't think that arrangement would work.
     
  10. santanu

    santanu Member

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    First, sex is a human desire/need which cannot be controlled at will. Thre may be few exceptions but exceptions are not rules. We are slaves of our desires and emotional and physical need. Sex is also a biological need of almost all animals.

    Thre were/are microscopic bugs that propagate by cloning. They do not have sexual organs. God found a big problem in using this cloning method as a means to propagate and keep the species growing. The problem was that since all members of this bug have the same genetical makeup. The entire species were at a risk of elimination from a single attack of a virus against which none of them have any defense. The garden of the Almighty could turn into a desert in a single day. God introduced a better method that will keep the species growing and improving automatically. He introduced SEX. The advantage of this method cannot be counted. God, not only introduced a sexual classification according to the need to keep the garden growing for years to come. Every animal differs in their sexual need, style, duration, process etc. An Elephant comes into MAST (at the peak of sexual desire) at about once in five years but not human.

    Question is marriage without sex. Who can deny the fact the institution of marriage is nothing but a public permission for a private relationship. It's just a ritual to keep the society at large informed about the issue. Moreover, the number of such cases of no sex in marriage are very rare.

    SEX is the backbone of our existence on earth until the day we start producing human in laboratories.
     
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  11. penarboska

    penarboska New Member

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    The only way I could cope with a sexless marriage would be for both of us seeking emotional therapy,(couples counseling once a week) and both of us masterbating each other or watching porn movies together in bed. Also some of those dressup role playings, like dressing as a nurse and my husband is the patient; sexually excites some couples. Showing each other signs of physical affection, such as heavy petting under the sheets at night, could be fun if one of the partners is unable to have sex due to a disability. Another reason for long periods of absence of sex could be one person or both have medical problems that they no longer become sexual aroused due to the effects of medications they use. Always ask and find out the reason why you are not having sex anymore the way you used to because it may not be your fault after all.
     
  12. Hodari Haynes

    Hodari Haynes New Member

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    It's ok if the couple are "best friends" first overall. If it's the person that you want see when you wake up regardless of sex, you must have more to offer than sex.
    I would look at how much activities we enjoy doing together, but there could still be a question of infidelity.


    I was just talking to an older woman about her marriage, and she had some interesting things to say on the subject. She stated that her and her spouse have been together for 35 years, and her man still thinks other men are flirtatious with her, in some cases it is true. She says she might not have sex with him for a month or so.


    She says no other man is of any interest sexually, but she does notice when women flirt, or do things she considers edgy. Not only does she trust her husband, but she isn't threatened by her husband having female friends. In fact, they both have friends if the opposite sex.


    They have a great relationship overall though, they go to parties and functions together. Her husband does a lot to make sure she is happy too.

    They're friendship is just as strong as the marriage. Of course, this isn't always the case.
     
  13. InkBoy

    InkBoy New Member

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    I'd honestly think that would be okay for me. Love is love, it is the appreciation of a person for who they are and how they interact with you- not just the physical attraction and sexual intimacy. If you want to spend life with them, then I reckon it should be more of a strong companionship. A love that is more from the soul than from physical wants and needs.
     
  14. InkBoy

    InkBoy New Member

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    Well, I think you've just found that able person. Sex is not essential to my life, to my relationship with my partner, or any necessary human interactions as you've put it.
     
  15. InkBoy

    InkBoy New Member

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    It might be a human desire or need, but by saying it cannot be controlled by us essentially states that we are just lustful mammals that have no control over who we sleep with. I'm sure your statement is very broad. Exceptions are not rules indeed, but there are enough exceptions to make a hole in the validity of that rule.
     

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